ENGLAND BRACES!

The newspaper and the headline are real. From today’s paper.

My comments below depart from reality at some point.

As the headline from the Daily Express indicates, England is preparing for a weather event of historic proportions. The current forecast projects that England, specifically, London and surrounds, can expect the next ten days to bring sunny weather. (NB: for clarification, note that in England a forecast of “Partly Cloudy” is to be counted as “Sunny.” In fact out of the next ten days, only two are specifically forecasted as completely “Sunny.”)

As an example of the significance of this weather event, even the notoriously rainy and cold Lake District in northern England is forecast to have as many as six of its next ten days to be Sunny (i.e. sunny or partly cloudy). High temperatures in the Lake District may even soar to the mid 70’s on some of the more sun drenched of the next ten days.

As news of the pending weather event leaks out, Londoners are starting to experience shortages in sun lotion, swimming costumes, and ice cream. Rationing is being considered, and troops are on alert in case of rioting.

Trains, airports, and highways north are jammed as entire families try to wend their way north to those places that are forecast to continue to have “safe” weather, such as Scotland and Ireland. On their own, these countries are laying in extra beer and crisps for the expected onslaught of weather refugees.    

A local reporter in Pooley Bridge in the Lake District encountered a couple of visiting Yanks in a local pub, who would only identify themselves  as “Al” and “Marty", and enquired as to whether or not this weather event would cause them to change their plans. The two would make no commitment, other than to say that, “Damn, that sounds like some awesome hiking weather!”